Bananas

The winds of change are blowing, sluggishly.
Or maybe its me that's so horribly sluggish.

I'm fine with staying in bed- the whole day. And people are worried.
I don't get it.
But I sort of do.
Okay.

Heres a collection of sad post break up shit that I've written in the past few months.

He promised.
He lied.

She laughed.
She cried.

He played.
With her.

She accepted,
And hurt.




xxx






Sometimes, like right now, they're sitting and talking and laughing.
I laugh along- but then a memory, small but powerful wriggles in and intense sadness threatens to drown.
I miss laughing with you, at you, at me, together.




xxx




I brush away my tears and pick up the knife lying
beside me.
The blade is sharp and could easily slice through
flesh. 
I use it to slice a cucumber. 
The irony of mutilating a phallic symbol is not lost on me, nope.
The perfectly round circles are a bright green colour. 
I place two on either eye. They will help with the swelling, and ease away the bloodshot redness.
 Lying back on the soft leather couch, I once and for all make up my mind. 
No more.
No more crying. 
No more aching. 
No more hurt.
 No more hoping or yearning or rejection. 
No more heartache and no more painful devastation. 
There shall be none of that, anymore. 
No more.




xxx




There are no tears.
There haven't been for a ling time now.
There is a desert and it is barren, like all Good Deserts are.




xxx




Me.